Undocumented Immigrant/ Bullying
I have decided to be incredibly open about what I go through, because I have been contacted by so many people that give me tools to solve this problem but never mentioned it. To go through legalized bullying and keep quiet about it is wrong. I am not built to shut up and go with the system; I am obsessed about showing how broken the system is and when I get confronted with a dilemma, I get agitated and I will act on that impulse. I am lucky to know that I only behave this way when the law is broken. I do not tend to break the law because it is too stressful. I will never hit a person because it is not worth the effort of explaining my self to @egan police department.
I was an undocumented immigrant that knew the only way you were able to get your citizenship was to make sure you had zero crimes. I have been proud of how that process changed me and made me understandable. In the same token I have accepted that because I had to give up my rights as a human being to two women and lose myself in the process has given me a very astute understanding of what it means to be an undocumented immigrant. I drive everyday not only with my license and insurance but my citizenship papers so that if I were ever to be pulled over by any officer of the law, I would be able to shorten the pain of proving my citizenship. I used to thing I was paranoid that I was going overboard about how I was behaving and I listened to everyone else saying that I was going overboard. But honestly, I know having those documents will keep me safe.
When I treated myself to a Mercedes Benz after I got my green card I was pulled over by @eagan police department to tell me there was a discrepancy with my license on the way to pick up my daughters from school. I felt so incompetent that I was late and I was pulled over, but I was proud that for the first time in my life I was not scared. I went home to tell my ex about it because I knew it took me only 15 minutes and I was not obsessed because I was on the next plane home, even though it was a very welcoming thought. I was so thankful that I could pick up my daughters and did not have to worry about the police officers. I was able to get it rectified within 12 hours after defying the police orders to do it before picking up my girls.
I had to sell every possession I have just to survive and endure this fight because setting up a go fund me page would have been used against me in the court of law. To be tracked by your own police department because you are trying to be heard and they are busy covering their butt is scary. I wake up every morning with this fear, but I know I must keep moving. “A lion doesn’t eat grass.” I know no matter what I will not stop fighting to get to see my kids again by using the legal and shortest means to see them again.
I am not ranting, I am fighting because I am saying something, but as a society we have shut people out because this is a conversation too difficult to have and we avoid it at all costs and outsource it to therapists. I want to share my truth with the world, I am scared everyday about this level of exposure, but this is the shortest way to get my kids back.
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